
Simon rambles in. He rattles Alec’s equanimity.
I’m getting my haircut. I see it all in the mirror.
Simon’s his usual self: brash, bold, bloody stupid, He lisps some errant remark.
Alec drops what he’s doing, reaches for the fly swatter and chases Simon down the street.
It’s like a well rehearsed routine.
A month later I go back.. Simon doesn’t look so good. His eyes are puffy, his face a little swollen, his hare lip is bleeding.
What happened? George says, one of the assistants. Your girl friend beat you up again?
Simon blubbers out an obscenity. Alec reaches for the fly swatter and the chase is on again.
Simon is a sad sack, the world’s punching bag but he does have one trick up his sleeve. His dad is Lord Mayor of Mars. No one else can claim that.
How he got there long before Elon Musk is not explained but Simon basks in his glory. On Mars International Day — yes, there is one —Simon comes in, wearing his red skivvy and breaks into the Mars National anthem till he is chased out by Alec’s furious flyswatter.
One day Simon slumps in. Dad is not well. Dad needs Simon to take over. How will he get there? Everyone knows by now that Simon has a rocket ship tucked in a corner of his bedroom at the ready. But Simon as Lord Mayor? Would those Martians treat him seriously?
Simon doesn’t appear the next month nor the one after that.
In fact, he doesn’t appear again.
Can one disappear into one’s own fantasy?
*pic courtesy of Wikipedia
I hear that Donald is also in a slump.
He keeps talking of voter irregularity
whilst playing the triumphant Trump.
It is most peculiar.
Is it the Insanity, or deluded fantasy,
of a very bad loser?
Either way, he’s completely
disappeared up his own sphincter.
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HaHa; I’ll pay that one, David; clever —
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When your full of shit the flies find ya, however I’m hoping he’s buried himself deep.
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Don’s interplanetary poetry has
reminded me, I’m currently reading
this book, `Men Are From Mars,
But Donald Is Just A Narcissistic
Penis’. It’s a tragic comedy wirh a
twist.
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aahh I know that book, David but have never read it; I don’t know where Trump is from?
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They’ll never make it into a movie.
Who’d want to watch that slow
motion train wreck all over again!?
I believe Trump hails from the
Golden Tower of Mordor. That’s
where property tycoons, and orcs,
come from.
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Bwaahhaaa, David glad I wasn’t drinking anything while I read your response, or it might have been launched onto the screen!
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Careful, Elle.
That’s exactly how Trumps,
and Martians, are spawned 😱
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Omg 😆
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I’m impressed David…..He’s a drinking buddy with Elon and been given best seat on Space Rocket Mars…gratis would you believe …yes you would believe….you rub my back I’ll rub yours sorta thing….maybe another part of the anatomy? …who knows….who cares….anyhow I’ll be glad to see him disappear ….and do a nosedive into the briney? funny how Musk’s rockets seem to do that?……
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I did see someone waving back the other night from what looked like Mars. John. Sounds like he made it…..
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love that touch of fantasy, Don: thanks for joining in the fun 🙂
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I’m always on for a spot fun……
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An all this time I thought Simon was just an ordinary 🪰
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there was nothing ordinary about Simon, least of all his sudden disappearance: everytime I hear a reference to ‘The Martian’ movie, I think of Simon:)
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simon says….
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very good, Beth; I should have seen that one coming but as usual you’re a few steps ahead of me 🙂
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Poor Simon. I hope he’s okay. People like that have pretty tough lives, I imagine. He’s probably met more than one fly swat. I hope some “Martian” came and saved him. I really do.
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I’m with you; I have empathy for the Simon’s of this world; I just hope he ended up in a good place: at least, the lisp and hare lip would be more tolerated these days you would think —
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Wild and imaginative…love this John.
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thanks Bob: a flight of fancy 🙂
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Love this. Funny and sad at the same time. I’m sure Simon is chasing Martians whit a giant fly swat from Earth.
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Lol ; that is very funny, Ulle; getting his own back 🙂 it’s tricky being both funny and sad but if you got the right material you can make it work 🙂
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I enjoyed the combination of the surreal with the day to day tragically. No question about that, I have realised recently there are lots of simons around.
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I reckon you’re right and they’re worth celebrating if you get to know them enough. I took real care with this one —
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Hi John, This is delightfully twisted and I love it.
It’s a bit of a longer piece than what I’m used to reading from you as well. 🙂
I like the name Simon, went to grade school with a boy by that name and he had a stutter – rare back then. We were friends, so this brought back nice memories of him.
Like the Simon in your poem, others used to chase him, made fun of him … but he resurrected himself in fine form as a teenager – changed his look completely, found new friends.
Maybe that’s what happened to your Simon too. 😉
eden
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thanks Eden; it is longer than my usual pieces so I;m glad you stuck with it; and thanks for the story of your Simon; I like to think that Simon turned his life around too: it is possible while you are young —
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