
A Short Venomous Tale
It is the venomous time of evening.
Sun setting. Close and muggy.
Her eyes dart around like mosquitos.
zeroing in on the small group at the edge of the pool
sipping G & T’s.
She settles on her prey, the malicious Minerva.
Punctures her composure, draws blood.
She will not be swatted.
She is feeling positively encephalitic.
*pic courtesy of pinterest
Creepy!
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yes, my very good friend gave me the line: ‘her eyes darted around like mosquitoes’ and I built a tale around that; plus I love the word ‘encephalitic’ and have been wanting to put it in a poem for months —
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I’m mean, some people wait their whole lives to use that word in a sentence )
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yes, I got lucky, Beth 🙂
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You’ve definitely created quite a mood here! What a nasty character.
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thanks, Worms; it all came together this morning —
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One encephalitic symptom is a reduction in alliteration apparently. I didn’t know that…….
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Lol; I only knew the word ‘encephalitis’ but I much prefer the more melodious ‘encephalitic’ —
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Like melodic is more melodiously melodic than melodious…….
Melody oh Melody
Meldy wiff an M
You are so odiferous
Diferous wiff an O
Did you put underarm on?
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What a delightful description, that venomous time of day. So unique! And you capture the evil and madness of something preternatural lurking pool side so brilliantly. I wonder what she’s about to do or say? I can imagine many mischievous things.
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I thought I’d leave it there and let the readers’ wild imaginings take over. The mosquito metaphor was my dear friend’s, the setting courtesy of ‘The White Lotus’. Thanks K; I feel i nailed this one —
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I agree. A sure strike. Well done. 😃
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Oh, I love the creepy feeling and “venomous time of evening.” Very good!
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I like doing these tight little tales; mosquitos was the perfect metaphor and, of course, talking of magic, that magic word ‘encephalitic;
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I wouldn’t want to be in her line of sight. Good poem, John!
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thanks, Neil: you’d be a wise man 🙂
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Your poem put me on edge! Wonderful last line and the use of the word “encephalitic.”
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thanks Eden; every now and then you nail it 🙂
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This is just fun!
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I never thought of it like ghat but thanks 🙂
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Very well done! I had to look up encephalitic. Definitely creepy.
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that’s the word I wanted to lead towards and end with; glad you liked it, Bob; it’s good when you nail something 🙂
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The words and image are twisting my mind. You’ve stung hard, John. There’s no other way. Haha. 🙂
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thanks Terveen; I was pleased with this one, 🙂
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How can you just write so amazingly about everything around you ?!! Kuddos to you
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you’re too kind; it’s the one skill I’ve got so I’ve cultivated it 🙂
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Love the way you create an atmosphere and an alternate reality with so few words!
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that was the aim, thank you:)
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Brilliant. Just brilliant 🖤🖤
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you know what it’s like; sometimes the magic happens, and it all comes together 🙂
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Well it certainly did here! 😊🖤
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