My Keyboard is Monocultural

My keyboard is monocultural

has no linguistic spark

for nowhere does it recognize

the diacritical mark.

It’s positively Neanderthal

it waves its arms and shouts

but nowhere acknowledges

our dear friend, umlaut.

Yes, it’s almost prehistoric

a keyboard Godzilla

never heard of a circumflex

or even the cedilla.

And what about the breve, brachy,

the wedge and the hacek?

My keyboard shrugs its shoulders.

Ah, Just as I suspect.

My keyboard is being sent

to a re-education camp

so it comes back enlightened,

diacritically amped.

Lapsed into a Comma



The very long sentence in an effort to beat its predecessors ran on and on and on over fifty five and a half pages after which time it lapsed into a comma, then another, and another till semi-colonized by tedium it slowed right down; sighed; lurched to the left then came to an abrupt full stop.


what’s the longest sentence you’ve read or written?

do you enjoy long sentences? do you occasionally try them just for fun?

how long do you think a sentence should be? what are its natural constraints?

The Last Word


You always want the last word.

Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror, question yourself?

You like things open and shut. In neat little packages.

Even when we can’t see you, we hear you.

I’ll give you this. You go about your work quietly, not like your loud, foot stamping cousins

But there’s so many of you. You could loosen up, give others a go.

I know in some countries you go by a different name

But a rose by any other name is still a rose

And a full stop by any other term is still a full stop.