What are we even doing here?
You took us from the cool supermarket shelves and abandoned us on this warm table.
Because some kids might rock up on Halloween and say “Trick or Treat?” and you don’t want to come across as the bad guy.
Well, take a look around. No one’s knocked.
What are you going to do with us? You don’t even like chocolate.
Oh God, you’re not going to dump us, are you? Can we appeal to your better nature and take us back to the supermarket? They’ll be glad to see us.
Wait. Did you hear that? There’s a knock at the door. I see three goblins peering through the window. They’re for us.