Afternoon Delight

Late Autumn sun

Lift the blinds

Sun streams through

and strokes me

spread on the soft blue sheets

in my striped woolen jumper

and I purr

Blowing Rainbows

Blowing Rainbows

Maybe if I was a little less lethargic

I could turn to things pelagic

and swim in the open sea

my arms and my legs

could become fin-amajegs

and I could blow rainbows

through my nasal cavity

*pic courtesy of Pinterest

Ugg Boots

I like your ugg boots, I say to the jetty.

Thank you, it says.

They look sort of … clumpy though, I say.

Well they are heavy duty.

I reckon I wouldn’t mind trying on a pair. For the beach only, of course. Where do you get them?

Well, you have to become a pylon first. You just stand around. They sort of grow on you.

Whoa, I say, don’t reckon I’m ready for that.

Suit yourself , it says.

So off I go to the store on the esplanade to get a pair, off white to match the pylons.

Shuddering Flanks

 

There’s something about a cold, starlit night that gets me going: the glitter of the galaxies, the pixie dust of the Milky Way, the motherly eye of the moon, the peace, a full stomach. I drift to the back of the yard past the reach of the kitchen light and stand by the lemon tree — I’m told it’s always good to do it there. My flanks begin to shudder as I unzip and I piss like a stallion, throw my head back and neigh.